A Washington state family’s journey to reunification, with the help of Parents for Parents

Chris and Jamie Page emotionally recount their experience dealing with child protective services for more than a year as they worked tirelessly to successfully reunify with their 11-year-old son Powers and 8-year-old daughter Presley, despite myriad of challenges.

Bellingham natives Chris and Jamie’s strong sense of self awareness and desire for help with their substance use challenges lead Chris to proactively reach out to the Department of Children, Youth and Families (DCYF) in July 2018 to ask for support. At the time, they were turned away and their battle with substance use continued, compounding the issues they faced at home, while raising two young children. When things finally reached a breaking point in November 2018, Chris and Jamie were homeless and still struggling with substance use. DCYF stepped in to remove the children from their care.

“The kids were removed on a Friday and we were told they’d be home Monday,” Jamie recounted. “We didn’t see them again for nine weeks.” At a crossroads, Chris and Jamie were pushed to seek the help they so desperately knew they needed, fueled by the powerful motivation of getting their children back home with them in a safe, stable environment.

Chris and Jamie quickly began engaging with all areas of support afforded to them, developing strong relationships with their lawyer and counselors to build a team of advocates on their behalf. At that point, they were introduced to Parents for Parents (P4P), a parent mentorship program implemented statewide by Children’s Home Society of Washington that pairs parents new to the child welfare system with those who have successfully navigated the system to provide critical emotional support during what Chris deemed ”the fight of our lives.”

Racial inequities played a role in the challenges they faced in reunifying with their children. As a biracial couple, Chris felt vilified through the process as a man of color, with additional biases against him from the onset given a criminal past. “From the beginning, we decided the focus was about the kids,” Chris said. “You come into a situation like this with your own set of trauma, but we had a critical desire to grow as a family, and we were committed to doing the work to get our kids back and keep our family together. I would tell other families dealing with similar situations to not be too proud to ask for help. There is support out there for you, too.”

“It was a rough start, but they went into it with their eyes wide open and accepted and embraced every class, every tool, and every suggestion that we offered them – they are amazing people,” Sunny Ward said, a Parents for Parents program ally who worked with the Pages throughout their case. “It was incredibly rewarding to watch them change and grow as individuals, as a couple, and as a family throughout their case.”

It was a long, arduous road which ultimately led to reunification, but that did not deter Chris and Jamie from their ultimate intention of getting healthy and reuniting with their two children. Jamie and Chris completed all required courses mandated by their case and compiled with every request from DCYF, counselors, and case managers. Concurrently, Jamie and Chris worked multiple jobs to ensure they could successfully provide for their family, while also earning their respective college degrees.

“They have a light inside them that they never let go of, and they shine brightly together,” Johni Gibson, P4P program coordinator said. “It was profoundly gratifying to see them actively engaging with other parents and sharing their perspectives, as well as validating the experiences of newer parents that came into the system while they were receiving supports from the Parents for Parents program. When I think about the Pages, what comes to mind is ‘the teacher becomes the student!’ They came to our group to get support and knowledge, and in turn taught me to be a better parent ally and person.”

In December 2019, their children returned home, with the pandemic impacting every aspect of life soon after. While the past 15 months have been a struggle for so many, the Page family found the positives in being able to spend significant time together as a family.

“In a way, the pandemic was a blessing for us,” Jamie said. “We were able to spend more time with our kids than ever before, making up for lost time and rebuilding our foundational bond as a family.” The Pages welcomed a third child, Piper Lue, in April 2021.

The Pages continue to offer support to families dealing with similar scenarios to help others navigate the stressful landscape of the child welfare system, and remain engaged in the Parents for Parents program, dependency support groups and 12-step programs.

The Parents for Parents program (P4P) was developed in Pierce County in 2005 by a parent who had successfully reunified as a family and wanted to pair other frightened and anxious parents navigating the foster care system with supportive mentors who had been through their experience. Through legal and nonprofit partnerships, the P4P program was passed and signed into law by Gov. Jay Inslee in 2015 and is administered by Children’s Home Society of Washington. All counties in Washington state will have P4P by the end of June 2021.

To learn more about Children’s Home Society of Washington’s Parents for Parents program, visit: https://www.childrenshomesociety.org/reunification.

 

Kristen Conte is the marketing & communications director for CHSW.