We have been reminded as a society in the last several months that the only constant in life is change. Families have experienced disruption in all aspects of their lives since COVID-19 hit in March, turning everyday events upside down with an urgent need to find a new normal. But how does this affect children in foster care, awaiting their forever homes?
Terri Nakamura, a native Pacific Islander who is a single mother and business owner in Port Orchard, Wash., navigated the waters of change for nearly three years as a foster mother to three siblings: Michael, 9; Roman, 8; and Lilliana, 6. She felt a calling to foster for some time prior to meeting the three siblings in 2017, when she was connected to these children through Children’s Home Society of Washington’s Wendy’s Wonderful Kids (WWK) program, supported by the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption (DTFA). Terri began working with CHSW WWK Recruiter Charlie Gates. “I always try to connect kids with familial placements when possible, but the kids viewed Terri as family from early on in their relationship,” Charlie said.
On the path to Terri finalizing the adoption, COVID-19 hit. Through the pandemic, Terri and her children continued to evolve with the circumstances, accustom to change and supported by a strong, nurturing force they found in their foster mother. Their happy ending culminated in the finalization of their adoption this June, via a live Zoom session.
In 2004, CHSW was chosen to be one of the original pilot organizations for WWK, starting with only two specialized adoption recruiters. In 2016, on the strength of CHSW’s program, Washington state was selected by DTFA as one of the first five states to participate in the national expansion of WWK. This expansion allowed the program to fully scale in Washington, equipped with enough specialized adoption recruiters to serve the target demographic of teenagers, sibling groups and children with special needs.
The CHSW expansion effort launched in fall 2017 with the support of Gov. Jay Inslee, in partnership with the Department of Children, Youth and Families (DCYF). WWK is part of a 10-year permanency initiative that is a collaboration between CHSW, Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption and the Department for Children, Youth and Families. Since the expansion, CHSW has served more than 289 children, matched 135 children pending adoptions, and finalized over 26 adoptions. Learn more in our Annual Impact Report.
Terri’s intention was always to provide a stable, loving home for these children in need with the purpose of reunification with their birth parents. She was also aware that it is often beneficial for siblings to be placed together in order to maintain the biological connection, one of the pillars of the WWK program.
“I went into the role of foster care mother with a pretty set mind; what I learned is that everything changes. I discovered I was meant to be the forever home for these kids,” Terri said. “The times when you are struggling to deal with behaviors, you reflect that the child is in pain and the root cause is just wanting to be loved and feel secure.”
Terri fostered Roman and Michael for nearly four years and Lilliana for three and a half. After two unsuccessful adoptions with other families during that time, it was clear that these three siblings were already home where they belonged – with Terri. “My love for them grew as I cared for, advocated and loved them like my own flesh and blood,” Terri said. Charlie was delighted to learn of Terri’s decision to pursue adoption. “Once Michael, Roman and Lilliana knew they were going to remain with Terri, they were happier than I’d ever seen them before.”
This is just the beginning of Terri and her children’s story. Their heartwarming journey includes a rich dedication to family heritage and tradition. They have weekly open-door family lunches on Sundays with Terri’s grown children and their significant others, along with another foster child who stayed with Terri for some time. This provides a warm, comforting place for all to gather and share in the joys of life as a big, happy family. Terri also remains in touch with the adoptive mother of her children’s fourth sibling to ensure the kids maintain their familial bond.
Kristen Conte is the communications director for CHSW.
Terri and her adoptive children created a special T-shirt to wear on the day of their virtual adoption finalization. The detailed imagery is representative of their collective heritage and commitment to family. The Japanese word kanji means faith, which they relied on during their journey. Washington state represents the children’s place of birth. The wolf reminds them of their birth parents and Native American heritage, and is a symbol of guardianship, loyalty, quick instincts and firm emotional attachments. The Hawaiian Islands are where Terri is from, with the word ohana meaning family. Tribal symbols and Honu symbolizes the bond that ties the family together.